The Ripped Soul

Mom surprised me with a Lady Gaga magazine. Freakin Rolling Stones magazine. Haha. I showed my mom the poster I got from Anna and my mom left my room. Undefeated champion.. still the poster. Lol.

Work today.. tiring. Awesome, nevertheless. 1 man in the kitchen, Alan. And I was calling and navigating and sending food out. Feels awesome to actually be able to handle the slams like that. Kinda like that "professional" feeling.

All day at work and Sha was pushing me about the email. Should she send? She doesn't care about what Sam thinks or what Diz thinks. All she wants is the green light from me and she's gonna send it.

I told her I got no issues with it, I just don't want her in any trouble.

I know for a fact on my last day I'm going to send him one myself.

I'm tired of all the rumors. TIRED. "I heard you're resigning because of your pay? I heard you're resigning because of Na? I heard you're resigning because of Kat? I heard you're resigning because you can't get a transfer of your choice? I heard you're resigning because you couldn't go to the concert? I heard you're resigning because you did something wrong? I heard you're resigning because you can't get to work with Diz?"

Full.
Of.
Shit.

The reason why I'm leaving is simple. I am sick of the principle behind everything that happened. I wasn't at the outlet for ONE fucking week. ONE week of goddamn MC. They didn't see anything. I had to come back, throw my letter, explain myself and WHY I want to resign, then they saw it. Reality slapped them in the face when I showed a copy of the sales voucher.

And even after that, they could call me stupid, say I'm a quitter and I will always be a quitter, and then all that hostility. Worse, that fuck could bring up my past and compare that to this now.
He didn't even know what happened then. How dare he.

I wasn't even asking for a pay raise, though that would've been nice.

I've been through so much shit.. Kat attempting suicide, managing an outlet for myself the entire week, and when they threw me Na, I had to handle her, and affix/accustom myself to her style of work.. wrong as it was. I was struggling as the no.2, and they promised me someone that will guide me throughout my training. LIES. I was promised the increment.. but where was it? LIES. Rene made judgement even before knowing the real story behind everything, wondered why I showed such disrespect, questioned my respect for her. And after telling.. do I even get an appreciation of sorts? Even after doing their homework for them.. do I?

Nope.

Instead I get called stupid, receive such wonderful hospitality when I get my ass to Parade, get treated with hostility, and get rejected for a chance to go for the concerts. I've heard it all. And I'm done.

I'm tired of all of it. That's why I want to resign.

Stupid fuckers.

Claris got me a pull in at Game Haven.. interview some time this week.

Prolly gonna part-time at that for a while. And maybe, catering? :D

Speaking of which, I saw Yasmin today! HAHAHA.

Couldn't believe I'd have missed her. But I did! She came by to eat with Ross. Got her email address for facebook. Now I got a new friend! And she has someone new to disturb when she's at work. Lol.

Sigh.

I miss so many people.. I feel so detached from everyone in my life.

My mom's birthday on 18th, I didn't even go out with them.. because of work.
My brother and his girlfriend going out to play Wii and asked me along.. didn't join because of work.

I haven't met Sherlyn in a LONG fucking while.
Jocelyn in an EVEN longer time.

I miss those clowns.

I miss Anna Banana.

And funny, but I miss you too..

I wish I didn't feel so lonesome. Sigh.