The Ripped Soul

Work started awesome.

Nasi Lemak with Sha and Ril outside.. at 1115am. Even had time for a smoke, and TIME to open business as usual. We are just that awesome working. Hahaha.

Got ticked off during work.. heard some things that shouldn't just.

First it was the assumption that I was leaving because I didn't get the transfer I asked for and I was choosing who I wanted to work with - NOT TRUE. If that was, then don't you think I'd have asked for a transfer when I was in Tampines?

Now it's "can't be Na, because Na works just like me. She's very fussy."

So what? It's on me? That's what you're trying to say..?

Haha. Wow.

Before I leave and they're trying to implicate this on me?

Just wonderful.

Sha was saying to send an email to the bosses themselves.. Diz said to watch for it, to tell E first.

What's the point in telling someone that clearly isn't on my side of the fence anymore?

He's clearly only trying to be civil because he has to work with me at the outlet.. otherwise, think he'd care? Hah.

I could tell the bosses, clear my name, get people in trouble, break not one, but maybe a couple of ricebowls.

Or I could keep shut and just walk.. 7 days more anyway. ....and be known as a black sheep.

What to do? Even I don't know.

Then ordertaking for dinner before Kitten arrived.. and I saw someone. She reminded me of someone I knew..

And the someone was.. you.

Ms Kaur.

Her geeky look on the outside - something I adored about you - how softspoken she was - how softspoken you could be...

And when she took a seat, I was rolling cutleries and making fun of Adi.

I looked up and saw her sitting there, and I thought of you. She sat down the same way you did.. the way she crossed her legs. And her hair all tied up in a ponytail like yours. She looked just like you at first glance..

But my heart didn't leap in joy anymore.

The memory of you wasn't a happy one anymore.

I felt sad. Really sad.

Sadness threw me over.. and my heart really ached terribly. I was screaming inside.. the voice inside was screaming in anger, in rage, in misery, sadness.. and I was filled full with heartache.

Even when her order was ready I asked Kit or Adi to go settle the order.

I didn't want to have any contact with her.

See her face whenever I look at you, wouldn't believe all of the things she put me through, this is why I just can't get with you...

I need a fix. Badly.

Can anyone fix me? CAN ANYONE FIX ME?! Fix this heart, fix these lips, fix this head, fix this soul.. fix me.. fix any part of me.. can you? CAN YOU?!