Every time I do, every time I try for it, it blows up like a motherfucker in my face.
The other time it was trying for something that was clear from the start that it would fail.
My heart said, "try. You might be the one who changes her mind."
This time it was "wait. Try. Do everything you have to, to fly. Be with her. Love her like how you've always loved her."
And I had to watch her love someone else.
Do you even know how painful that is? It is battling rejection and heartache all at once.
And tonight I just haven't got the strength to fight anything anymore.
I just want to die.
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