The Ripped Soul

Fight over money at 4am. Scream. Shout. Throw shit out. Threaten. Cry. Shout more. Slam doors. Shout louder. Scream. Cry. Whine.

Fight over money at 10am. Shower.

Fight over money at 3pm. Switch phone off.

Fight over money at 4pm. Someone calls and asks if I can do a favour and go online to ask other people for favours to borrow money by the THOUSANDS. Asks if it's safe to do so.

FUCK. YOU. You know crazy? That's what you are.

Fight over money at 5pm. I can give you so much to travel, but what about when you meet them? How are you going to pay for your computer game or a movie? It's not enough, right?

It's never enough, but they help to pay for me and I already owe them so much...

Sleep hoping everything goes away and never comes back.

Wake up, whatfordinner.

I still feel like shit because I promised friends I'd go out, but nope, I can't go out. Because there's no money. I can't travel. Not even my fucking bike. I can't even cycle anywhere.

I wanna get mad at my mom, but I can't even get mad at her because I know she's trying.

So should I be angry at them?

Yeah, I think I should be.

People that promise the thousands. Promise so much for christmas. Promise so much for the coming year. Ask me about flying around the world like as if it's really going to happen.

It's never going to happen.

And what hurts so much I guess, is the fact of a killed dream.

Thanks for killing my dreams this christmas.

Thanks so much.