I didn't know how to answer them, so my excuse was it's only the middle of March. Our little holiday is like, in early April.
But I was thinking about it, and as much as I try to get hyped for it, I'm just not. To me it's just another step out of the country with my best friends. I've gone to JB with Anna more than once, I've gone to Malacca when I was a kid on an annual basis, and I've crossed over to JB with my mom and Godmother whenever they're on a long leave. Not forgetting that killer trip to JB with the ex.
I know I SHOULD be hyped for it because it's our first trip out together out of our 9 years being friends, but I'm just not feeling it.
I do, know, though.. if someone were to come along and say "hey Jess, here's a ticket to Alabama or Florida, " I would definitely go fucking bonkers.
Because right now that's the only place my heart wants to be. That's the only place my eyes want to see. That's the only place where she is, and where she is is where I want to be.
I shouldn't be complaining or ranting, since Lyn helped me settle the payment for the trip over while I pay her back slowly. All I gotta do is save up some Sing for Ringgit and we'll be going nuts on shopping sprees and roller rides.
So.. this isn't a complaint. Or a rant. Just an explanation? I guess.
First thing I did when I woke up today was go over to GSC to play L4D2 with Shea. I mean, I don't normally go off gaming on my own. Usually it's with the usual suspects.. Wayne, Joce. But I went on my own. And a little lost I did seem, but when I managed to hook up on a game with her, it strangely felt like a little connection.
So close yet so far, huh?
I'm at home, smoking.. and all I'm doing is racking my brains out trying to figure out a way how I can just go over to Alabama already.
Gotta admit.. it feels a little lonely sometimes. Seeing everyone all paired up.. and my heart screams for the other.. but she's half a world away.
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